This study was created by psychologist Dr. Arthur Aron back in the last century to see if two completely unknown people can fall in love in the first date by asking each other a set of personal questions.
Warning: Make sure you are ready for some serious feelings before going in …
It is possible that you will fall in love with each other after this in-depth conversation so grab some wine, sit down with someone you want to love and let’s get started.
Each of you must both openly answer and sincerely listen to the other person’s answer, going through each of the 36 questions. In conclusion, after asking the questions, you will have to look into each other’s eyes for at least 3-4 minutes.
- If you could have dinner with anyone in the world, who would it be?
- Would you like to be famous?
- Before making a phone call, do you ever repeat what you want to say? Why?
- What would be your ideal day?
- When was the last time you sang to yourself? Someone else?
- If you lived to the age of 90 and could have kept either the body or either mind of a 30-year-old for the last 60, what would you choose?
- Do you have a secret idea how you will die?
- Name 3 things you think we have in common.
- For what are you most thankful in your life?
- If you could change anything about how you were raised up, what would it be?
- Tell your life story in as much detail as possible in 4 minutes.
- If you could wake up tomorrow with any ability or super-power, what would it be?
- If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about you, your life, your future or anything else what you would like to know?
- Is there something you have long dreamed of doing? Why haven’t you done it?
- What is the greatest achievement of your life?
- What do you value most in friendship?
- What is your most valuable memory?
- What is your scariest memory?
- If you knew you would die suddenly in a year, would you make a difference in your lifestyle? Why?
- What does friendship mean to you?
- What role does love and feelings play in your life?
- Name 5 positive qualities that you think I have.
- How close is your family? Do you think your childhood was happier than others?
- How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
- Make 3 “we” statements each. For example, “We both feel in this room …”
- Complete the sentence: “I wish I had something to share …”
- If we would become good friends, what would be important for other to know?
- Tell the other person what you like about him, but very honest. Something that you would not normally say to a person you just met.
- Tell a shameful incident from your life.
- When was the last time you cried?
- Tell the other person everything you like about him
- What is topic is too serious joke about, if any?
- If you had to die tonight, without the opportunity to contact someone, what would you most regret not saying? Why didn’t you say that?
- Your house caught fire, after you have rescued all your relatives and pets, it is time for you to run again and grab one item. What would it be? Why?
- Of all your relatives, whose death would be most painful? Why?
- Share a personal problem and ask the other person how to deal with it. Also ask the other person to tell them how they see your feelings about the problem.
Now you look into each other’s eyes for at least 3-4 minutes. To be safer, you can hold hands.
The article uses questions from Arthur Aron’s study, “The Experimental Generation on Interpersonal Closeness: A Procedure and Some Preliminary Findings”
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